Counselor Comments
Sandra Farrell, MS,CADC
Specializing in Couples Counseling and Alcohol and Drug Recovery
Comments from the Counselor:
However, motivation and resistance are ever changing states of readiness. To lower the client’s resistance positive action is required from the client. Even with these positive actions change is difficult and the client may feel stuck. Nevertheless, action and change help predict new behaviors. New behaviors encourage clients to move forward and to reach their goals. But there is a big difference between thinking about change and taking action to make those changes. The client is taught how to develop healthy habits of self-advocacy. CFTI clients develop the necessary skills to address this. They will focus on verbalizing optimism and demonstrate commitment.
This work is essential to personal growth and counseling can encourage individuals to face the adversity and barriers they encounter as they move forward in their recovery program. It is a move forward to self-actualization. Clients are offered the opportunity to talk about and understand their fluctuating emotions. The client can then act on what needs to be changed. Client’s lives are improved by taking one step at a time. Clients begin to believe, I am worth the effort to get better.
Clients do not want to lose those they love, to isolate from the world, to have anxiety and confusion, to experience deep depression or to completely lose trust in themselves and others. Nevertheless, that is often their reality when they enter treatment. With counseling support, clients develop the power to turn things around for themselves. They understand that thoughts, feelings, behaviors, goals and self-caring are areas they need to work on in sessions and outside of sessions. They work toward the positive adjustments needed and that takes time.
If you need help please call Sandra Farrell, director at Counseling For Today’s Issues, (508-873-2132) and discuss what your needs and concerns are. Begin your healthier and happier existence. Individuals have the capacity to change their lives.
Outpatient Treatment
Mashpee MA 02649
Falmouth MA 02563
508-873-2132
Sandra Farrell, MS,CADC
Love: The will to extend oneself for the spiritual growth of self and another.
Love and self-esteem have one major thing in common. They both require a lot of discipline and hard work. People often think that love and self-esteem just happen, that they are not responsible for nurturing these aspects of their lives. The opposite is true.
Answer the following questions and see if you are nurturing your relationships, relationships that include your past, present and future. Also, are you increasing your self-esteem with thoughts, feelings and behaviors that are positive and truthful?
How do you nurture YOURSELF? Your significant other?
How do they nurture you?
What are you willing to give up for them? Why?
Are you generally happy with this person?
Are you a caretaker? A people pleaser?
What do you require from yourself to be happy? From others?
Are you addicted to men, women, food, gambling, spending, sex, or substances?
What have you done to address your addiction?
Heightening self-esteem takes action.
Below are a few suggestions.
You may want to write a ‘Y’ (Yes) next to the ones you do well and an ‘N’ (Not yet) next to the ones that need attention.
I make decisions and follow through. I begin goal-setting strategies.
I take initiative, even if all alone in my efforts.
I state my opinions clearly, but also listen to others.
I am not judgmental, prejudiced or over-bearing.
I can set personal limits on my time, energy and money.
I express anger appropriately and let others express theirs.
I am learning to be flexible.
I can support others without wanting a ‘pay-back’.
I don’t mind asking for help.
I understand that there can be a friendship between a man and woman
and not always mean there has to be sexual connotations.
I participate in community affairs and am aware of national events and world affairs.
I do not manipulate others.
sf/10
WHEN SOMEONE SHOULD SEEK THERAPY
Undue, prolonged anxiety
Depression or mood swings
Employment issues
Loneliness
Difficulties in relationships
Life events: marriage, divorce, death, parenthood, retirement
Chronic physical illness caused by tension and stress
Problems following traumatic events such as accidents, childhood abuse, etc.
Problems with domestic violence or other forms of abuse
Stress in the face of chronic or terminal illness or other health problems
Constant worries or obsessions
Excessive anger, frustration, or guilt with no resolution
Self-destructive thoughts and behavior
Problems with drugs or alcohol
Call Sandra now (508) 873 2132
Understand how individuals set goals. Someone else can not set your goals for you. Successful goals need to reflect your new way of thinking. New behaviors will follow.
One of the most successful ways to develop goals is to make them BEHAVIORAL. This identifies them clearly and gives you a specific place to start.
Break the goals down to be as specific as possible.
Goals are most helpful when set in a positive direction. Not just the removal of something negative. Behaviors should be seen and structured as something positive.
Strive towards a counter conditioning approach. Set a positive goal that is incompatible with a negative behavior or the problem itself.
Identify and talk about a successful experience you have had due to developing a clear goal. Then build more ideas on that.
Go SLOW! Take the ‘first step’. Then take the ‘second step’. Then take a ‘third step’. Short-range goals are good beginnings. Intermediate goals will follow and that will lead into long range goals.
“First Things First”. Take the most urgent problem first. Look at your situation.
Assess your situation and begin to develop steps to rectify your problem. Understand how your thinking needs to change..
Be alert! Avoid situations that could be potential problems.. Identify problems early.
Build in a feedback mechanism. (Whom do you trust to share your ideas with?)
Change thinking – develop goals. Change behaviors – reach those goals.
KEEP PERSONAL NOTES ON HOW YOU ARE CHANGING YOUR THINKING AND YOUR BEHAVIOR. YOU WILL SEE YOUR PROGRESS.
The Woman's Support group is for women
21-85. Topics are relationships, anxiety, depression, hope, accomplishments,
fears, substance abuse or effected by
family, friends, stress, lifestyle changes.
Not more than 5 members at one time.
Open. Informal, friendly, supportive.
What is said in the group stays in the group.
Self pay only $20+